Phantasmix Stock Blog

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you, I’m doing community service this week.’ The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you I’m doing community service this week.’ The cop was happy and left the shop.

The next morning when the barber went to open for the day he found a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door. ( )

Then a Congressman came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The Congressman was very happy and left the shop.

The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Congressmen lined up waiting for a free haircut.

And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

…or just Happy VD! Whichever you prefer

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Herluf Bidstrup

Jason Love

B. Kliban

Sempe

“It would have been wonderful if you were a poor and sick artist when I met you. I would have taken care of you. I would have helped you all that I possibly could. We would have had discouraging times but we would have had wonderful ones, too. To the best of my powers, I would have protected you from the daily problems of life so that you could devote yourself completely to art. And little by little you’d become known. You would have become a great artist, admired, respected, adored; and one day you would have left me for a younger and prettier woman. It’s for that that I’ll never forgive you.”

WTF Vintage Photo

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Cleaning out my mail, and thought that some forwards should see the light of day one more time.

Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.

Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.

There will always be death and taxes; however, death doesn’t get worse every year.

Age doesn’t always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.

3 men go into a hotel.
The man behind the desk said the room is $30 so each man paid $10 and went to the room.
A while later the man behind the desk realized the room was only $25 so he sent the bellboy to the 3 guys’ room with $5.
On the way the bellboy couldn’t figure out how to split $5 evenly between 3 men, so he gave each man a $1 and kept the other $2 for himself.
This meant that the 3 men each paid $9 for the room, which is a total of $27 add the $2 that the bellboy kept = $29. Where is the other dollar?